Dear Diary,
Last night before bed, my left ear felt full, my nose began to run and my throat felt a little scratchy. So as not to alarm the other prisoners, I waited until everyone had retreated to their cells, then I quietly found the thermometer. I placed it delicately into my mouth and pressed the power button. The tiny beep normally is not a beacon but in this instance, the second I pressed it, my male counterpart opened our cell door. I was startled and jumped when he yelled “What are you doing?” As he stood in the doorway in his boxers, a certain look crossed his face. At first I thought it was concern, until I replied “Just checking my temperature. My throat is a little scratchy and my nose is running.” I quickly recognized that look was not concern. It was annoyance. His arm flew up into the air, executing a perfect knife hand, and he bellowed “You don’t have the Coronavirus! You have allergies! The weather is changing! Stop taking your temperature, YOU ARE FINE!”
Well, we all know the Lord spoke the world into existence. That’s a fact. My husband cannot speak things into existence. However, to placate him and ensure his prompt return to our cell, I put the thermometer away until I was sure he was asleep. I slept on the couch last night just in case I was contagious.
I woke up this morning with a stuffy nose, swelled up eyes, ear pain, a definite post-nasal drip, and sneezing. Still no fever on one of the 26 2 occasions I have taken my temperature again. I’m now about 98.6% sure it is just allergies, and there’s no need to cause panic in the district. Add that to the fact that, in my quest to avoid contaminating fellow prisoners, I did not go into the bedroom and take my daily allergy meds last night. Or the night before, because I fell asleep before taking my meds. This could be a rational explanation.
I must remain calm. I must not let the juvenile prisoners see my internal panic. I did spray every door knob and faucet with Lysol this morning. I did take a super dose of Vitamin C as well. I shall proceed with daily life as normal. Back to watching Doomsday Preppers…..
Not panicking,
Summer
The Crazy Christian Cat Lady 
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